Beauty regimen 101

I typically do not wear high heels because I am always carrying a baby, or more recently trying to get my almost two year old to walk in by holding my hand, which is about as difficult as getting a stubborn donkey to move (trust me...I speak from recent experience on that one....and it's tough!!)

 The only opportunity I get to even wear heals (besides the occasional date night) is church...and even with that sometimes I  get so into the worship (arms raised, eyes closed, swaying) that sometimes I will lose my balance in the middle of a praise song.

I am not even kidding.  

Normally each and every Sunday and the hubs gives me several sincere compliments about how pretty I look.  

Of course I brush them off with the usual, “Oh, you have to say that – you’re my husband.”

When really on the inside....

{{Insert choir singing the Hallelujah Chorus.}}

Well today he didn't mention anything sooo of course I had to point out..."babe you didn't even say anything about my outfit today". (Did I mention I was wearing heels??) 

I pondered this for the rest of the day and the Holy Spirit spoke straight to my heart on the matter.

It wasn’t just my husband’s affirming words I sometimes brush off when He gives them...but then demand them when he doesn't. 

I DO THIS TO THE LORD, TOO.

How many times does it say in the Bible that I am beautiful, loved, and valued by God?

But how often do I continue to seek the approval of others?  How often do I try new make-up or wear new clothes or high heels to feel beautiful?

When all along the Lord is whispering that I’m beautiful simply because I am His creation.

The world’s standard of beauty is ever-increasing.  We have to be thinner, have bigger boobs, gorgeous hair, clear skin, brilliant teeth…  And we go to all kinds of lengths to attain it.  We want other people to notice us.  It feels good to have someone tell us we are beautiful.

What happens, then, when that selfie we posted on Instagram didn’t get as many likes as we had hoped?  Or when the pregnancy weight is hanging on for dear life despite a healthy lifestyle?  Or the second wrinkles start showing up?

Instead of feeling worthless, we can make the choice to believe the words our Savior says about us.  Words that remind us about who we are and Whose we are.

We are fearfully and wonderfully made.

My boobs might sag a bit and my hair might cause me great stress and confusion on some days, but God sees me and delights in saying,

“I love how I made you!”

This is the message for women today.  We need to stop holding our worth out to the masses and take hold of the beauty we possess through the blood of Jesus.

We can receive His affirmations and they can be enough. 

We can still wear cute clothes and make-up, friends.  

We can still wear heels.

We can still take care of ourselves.

But we must make sure our beauty is defined by God.

And not by the ever demand of "hearing what others" think about us. 

Does it feel good to hear that someone thinks you look nice?? 

Sure it does!! 

But does that compliment or lack there of "define" you??

Not me...my beauty is defined by God. 

Thanksgiving.....and BEING thankful.

I know how easy it is to grumble and complain especially when I'm overly busy with things....and as the holidays approach it seems at times to overwhelm me and I find myself complaining. If y’all are anything like me then you might agree that we are a generation struggling with distraction and discontentment.  We are surrounded with beautiful images on Pinterest and our souls are never satisfied.  We read blogs and long for other people’s gifts/marriages/kids/lives.  We have heads that are filled up with expectations and hearts that are heavy with guilt.

We are missing something.

WE ARE MISSING GRATITUDE.

And I have determined to figure this out because gratitude leads to contentment and contentment leads to joy and I want that for my kids more than anything. 

I have done some research and am trying to make a way for this to be how my kids are learning about gratitude in our home…

 Say It For Them –

Any time my kids should be thanking me or my husband or someone else for something and they are not, I will simply remind them.  If I have just served them pancakes and they take their plates without so much as a backward glance, I will say, “Thank you, Mommy!”  My kids know that this is their cue to repeat after me.  If they don’t right away, I will keep saying, “Thank you, Mommy!” until they do.  Likewise, when my kids are starting to get grumbly about leaving the playground, I will say, “Thank you, Mommy, for taking us to the park!  That was so nice of you!”  Or if someone starts to whine about what I have cooked for dinner, “Thank you, Mommy, for making this yummy dinner for us!”  This usually quiets their complaints as their perspective is given a helping hand.

Sometimes we just have to PUT THE WORDS IN THEIR MOUTHS.  Then, one magical day, those words will come back out all on their own (I have lived to see this – hallelujah!!).

Just Say No –

Don’t give your kids everything they want right when they want it.  The End. 

But seriously, we need to watch out for this.  We are mommas.  We like to give our kiddos good things.  But often the good thing is to say no and endure the possible, *temporary* fallout (I’m looking at you tantrum in the toy aisle at Walmart) because ALL THE THINGS and instant gratification can muddy the waters of appreciation.  Instead, make them wait for something, work for something, or be challenged to just be satisfied with the somethings that are right in front of them. I am certainly NOT perfect at this BUT I am a perfect work in progress. 

Acts of Appreciation –

Do nice things for people as a way to show your thanks.  The boys and I are always finding little ways to bless teachers, daddy mowing the neighbors yard, blessing the super wash guy with cookies, WHOEVER.  

Biblical Inspiration –

We can’t rely on the old phrase, “Because I said so,” desr friends!  Our children need to understand the biblical truth behind why we do what we do and say what we say, so teach them God’s heart on the matter of thanksgiving.

• We can be thankful that God’s love for us will never run out.Psalm 107:1
• We can give thanks for our salvation. Hebrews 12:28
• We can use gratitude to help us trust Jesus with our worries. Philippians 4:6
• We can give thanks in the good and the bad. 1 Thessalonians 5:18
• We can use songs to give thanks. Psalm 95:2
• We can give thanks for our food because Jesus did.Matthew 15:36
• We can give thanks for what Jesus has done for us. Luke 17:11-19

Model, Model, Model –

This is IT!  Most of what our kids will learn from us will be ‘caught’ rather than ‘taught’, so if we spend a large majority of the time complaining about chores, dishes, messes, our weight/looks, inconveniences, hard things, our homes, people, etc., we must remember that our children are listening.

Instead, get that precious heart of yours filled up with the grace and kindness of Christ.  Let Him remind you of your many, many blessings – your salvation being the ultimate gift.  Let Him remind you that He is in control.  That He loves you and cares about every detail of your life.  Our hearts will be transformed as we make Christ our ultimate satisfaction and we will not be able to keep the resulting gratitude to ourselves.  This will translate into gracious encounters with others.

When the bagger at the grocery store has just carefully put everything in your cart and you thank him, those little ears will hear.

When your husband comes home from a busy day at work and you thank him for all that he does to provide for your family, those little ears will hear.

When you are on the phone with the doctor’s office and you speak kindly and thank them for their help at the end of the conversation, those little ears will hear.

When your children are all ready for school and waiting by the door without 10,000 reminders to get in the car, you will joyfully thank them and they will hear.

When you rise each morning and greet your kids with a smile and commit to rejoicing in the day that the Lord has made, they will hear and see.

And it will make a difference.

And here is the kicker...YOU will be happier as you give gratitude and THAT will teach gratitude!! 

I am so incredibly THANKFUL for our sweet boys and my wonderful hubby!!! This year I decided to do "thanksgiving cards" for our holiday card instead of Christmas cards to change it up a bit! Here are a few of our new family pictures!! 

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

What does true love look like to me?

This past week here in the Midwest it has gotten cooler. Which means I suddenly get verrrrry cold.

This is a very huge issue between my hubby and I because he is always very sweat and I am always very froze! (Improper usage intended...this is how we talk about it)

Which is not unusual because since we have been married we have battled this in our house! Even my sister in law use to call him the thermostat nazi because nobody is allow to adjust it(when he is home! :) 

Being cold this past week, however, was a problem because I when I get cold, I get shakey and cranky.  

Super dramatic I know. 

And before I lose you from the most boring blog post ever hold on tight because here is where it gets good. 

So I do what any normal person would have done.

I turn to my husband and ask him if I could put my hands in his armpits. Or under his shirt. 

Not because I wanted my hands to smell like man deodorant, but because ARMPITS ARE WARM.  And sometimes I just neeeeddd to warm up.

You know what my hubby does?? 

He says YES.

And my heart for him grows 50 times bigger for him. 

Who in their right mind would say yes to freezing cold icicles to be placed on them?

There were no dozen roses, there was no expensive vacation, and no fancy restaurant date.

I’m pretty sure that this is going down as one of the most strange sentences I have ever blogged (and I would imagine that most of you don’t even have a category for this kind of weirdness), but it was with my hands in my husband’s armpits that I felt the rich reward of a love committed to doing life together.

Forever.

The stuff that makes forever marriages isn’t really in the grand romantic gestures, but in the small, day-to-day sacrifices.  The little moments where one spouse chooses to love and serve the other without hesitation.

I am quite gifted at turning every light on in the house, as well as leaving various appliances plugged in and um ON!! (Last night for instance...after making dinner and baking dessert the usual "babe do you still need the oven" question was said with complete normalcy in his voice.) 

Obviously the hubby loves this about me.  Except not.  But he happens to be quite gifted at turning lights out and remembering to check every appliance in the house before we leave.

And he does it faithfully, without complaining (well, maybe a little complaining because, well, the house could burn down and it cost a lot extra) 

I make sure our pantry is stocked with all of his favorite snacks.

He gets the boys dressed when he knows I need to do my hair.

I put his clothes away.

He laughs at my mistakes (like running out of gas A few blocks from home.)

I admire the way he does the lawn.

I scratch his arm before bed.

And all that and much more 

 is TRUE LOVE, I tell you.

These things certainly aren’t glamorous, but they sure are pleasing to God.

My point?  Don’t stop doing these little things.

What if you do these little things, however, but you have let a seed of bitterness and resentment creep in for one reason or the other. 

Here is my encouragement to you – confess it.  Repent.  Try seeing your hubby as God does – with unconditional love – remembering that God’s heart for marriage is to love through patience and kindness, to look to the interests of the other, to not be easily angered or keep a record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13).

To love and never give up.

And to pray like crazy for your man and your marriage.

It's worth it.

Because when your hands are cold, it’s nice to have someone who will let you stick them in their armpits.